Public Speaking Tips Online

Charlie,

No, it is not because it is recorded. The voice you hear in your head is being recognized by your inner ear — sound that is primarily distorted — sound that is vibrating in the solid and liquid of the brain. (No one else hears your voice that way.)

What you hear on your answering machine, however, is the sound by which everyone recognizes you. Your ‘outer ear’ hears that sound and does not recognize it again because you are familiar with the voice heard by your inner ear.

Does that make sense?

That is right. While that may not be the most comforting answer, the good news is that you can improve your speaking voice. I call it finding your ‘real’ voice, a voice that is powered by the chest resulting in a more dynamic, resonant sound. You would be surprised at the changes that can occur in your life, both professionally and personally.

Thanks for your comment Charlie, and I wish you the best.

Dharmendra,

First, thank you for all your comments. Your ‘real’ voice will vibrate in your chest, mid-breastbone area, as well as in your back — not the vibrations you feel below your neck — those are a result of your vocal cords. Also, when you breathe, your diaphragmatic area, the area right below your rib cage will expand out and down, not up.

Mo,

Good question. The answer probably lies in your pronounciation of the two sounds. We all have a certain dialect…and our vowel sounds can be greatly affected by the region in which we live.

1. My guess is that you are not differentiating between bear and beer. I would suggest recording yourself saying these two words. Do not overcompensate (try to emphasize the difference). Say the words as you would normally. I would also say the words here and hair, mere and mare, peer and pair, ear and air; etc. Play it back and listen to it. If you do not hear a difference in your prounication, practice saying each word more distinctly. There is a difference between these two phonetic sounds.

2. Do you find that this happens only when you are speaking to people outside of the regional area in which you live or is it happening within your region? I know that people in the Boston area, for example, do not pronounce their ‘r’s. They ‘pack’ their cars instead of parking them.

3. I would also suggest practicing these two vowel sounds when you are driving. (I have my clients practicing their breathing and eliminating nasality, for example, when they drive, making use of that time.) The best exercise is to go back and forth between these two sounds, training your ‘inner ear’ to hear the difference.

Mo,

I just heard the other day, not sure if it was a movie, the radio, in an article or in person, that someone used a sack for their groceries. We refer to it as a bag, either plastic or paper. Seems it is the bag in the northern states and is called a sack in the southern states.

Glad to hear that your practice is helping. Without a doubt, if you listen more closely to your words, great changes can happen.

Nancy

Charlie-D,

If you phone me, I will talk to you and yes, the DVD will not only help you, it will show you exactly how to find your ‘real’ voice — one that you will enjoy hearing on your voicemail.

In addition, you will get my personal guarantee with Voicing It! If, at any time, you want to talk to me about your voice (I would love hear it!), you are welcome to call me on my toll-free number or email me and I will phone you. I want to hear what is happening to my customers!

Do call.

Nancy

Deborah,

Thank you for your comment. Interesting that you have noticed your listeners being comforted by your voice. What is fascinating about the speaking voice is that when you find your ‘real’ voice, your listeners will be comforted even more so because your voice will take on a very warm quality. This warmth is known as resonance and is only possible if the chest becomes the primary sounding board. James Earl Jones has it as well as Kathleen Turner, Julia Ormond, and Cher. You won’t sound old nor too young, just ageless. And it will improve with age which is priceless.

For ministers and others using their voice heavily, being able to power the voice from the chest eliminates abuse of the vocal cords but also means that you can increase your volume without shouting. (I recently spoke to a woman who is a minister in her 30’s and she has been shouting for a number of years. Because of that abuse, she will never sing again. That is so sad as she loves to sing. But, the damage to her voice is permanent.)

Do you have audio on your website that I could listen to? I would love to hear your voice.

Thank you for joining in on the conversation,

Nancy

1. Mo, I am pretty sure that it is not your tone, your accent, or your language.

2. The difference between male and female vocal cords is thickness and length; i.e., men’s voices are deeper because their cords are thicker and longer like one would find on a piano or a guitar.

3. Because most people are not using what I refer to as their ‘real’ voice, the pitch (highness or lowness of sound — not the volume), of their ‘habitual’ voice is usually higher which is why women, more so than men, may have a tendancy to sound too young. Once you find your ‘real’ voice, however, your pitch will drop and your voice will sound mature — not too old, not too young. Ageless.

Last week a woman phoned me on my business line (which is being forwarded to my cell) and upon hearing her voice, I just assumed she wanted voice training.

Her pitch was very high, she sounded very young, and her shrill nasal quality hurt my ears.

She wasn’t looking for voice training; she was trying to interest me in a business venture.

I often make a judgement of people over the phone by what I hear.

Do you?

@Charlie-D

Thank you for your comments, Charlie. I agree, but often the person I envision is nothing like what I later see in person. (Actually, this could be good but it can be bad as well!)

Glad to hear you are doing so well with Voicing It! and that you like hearing your ‘new’ voice on your voicemail!

Congratulations!